a disaster of epic proportions

first of all, i'd like to thank the five or six people who so gracefully handled the sobbing, panicky mess that was me last night. most notably my mom and grandmother who both sat patiently through several minutes of unintelligible blubbering before i could even spit out a complete sentence.

for those of you who did not receive a phone call, text, or facebook message (i was panicking people, i contacted like everyone i knew looking for a miracle) here's what happened.

almost a year ago, last October to be exact, i bought a dress. this dress. in a size four.


i didn't have an "oh my god, this is my dress" moment. i wanted to buy almost every dress i tried on, or at least three dresses from every gown-hunting excursion. i found this one at david's bridal in rochester with mr. z's mom and aunt. i really liked it and it was a fantastic deal, but it wasn't the right size. i really needed a six, but this dress was discontinued and there wasn't a six anywhere in the david's system. so the consultant called the seamstress out and asked her to take a look at it.

"no problem," she assured me. "its not that tight, we can fix it. no problem." so i bought the dress. (can you see where this is going??) i should have known better.

so at the beginning of august i took it in to the david's in columbus for my first fitting. the woman asked me what i wanted. i needed a bustle put in and some pads sewn in the bust, because even if the rest of me is a size six, my boobs are still a size zero. and i pointed out the fact that the waist didn't fit quite right. so she said they'd let it out around the waist an inch on either side. fantastic.

fast forward to yesterday. i had an appointment in the evening to pick up my altered dress. i put it on. boobs look great... and pads are firmly sewn in. (no one wants a boob pad flying out mid-chicken dance.) the waist, on the other hand, looks the same as it did pre-alterations. ashley said my face was priceless. i made a superstar effort to not say the f-word repeatedly. ashley asked the seamstress if maybe they took it in by mistake. seamstress said no, definitely let out. so we made plans to let it out some more and she showed ashley how to work the bustle.

the panic didn't start immediately. in fact, i made it all the way through a disappointing sushi dinner with ashley (two thumbs down for ba sho in dublin, if anyone cares). it wasn't until i was driving home that it suddenly occurred to me that the reason letting the waist out didn't make any difference is that the waist wasn't where the problem is. its too tight around the hips, so it rides up and makes the waist bunch. and the bad news is, the way the dress is constructed with the lace and everything makes it almost impossible to let out at the hips. so i officially flipped out.

thus began the tearful phone call marathon. at one point, my mom suggested i call the alterations department of david's back and tell them what i thought and tell them if they couldn't fix it, i would just pick it up and take it somewhere else. so i called and told the woman that it had suddenly occurred to me that the fit at the hips was the problem. she said she was thinking the same thing, but didn't know if she'd be able to let it out where it needed to be. she said she'd check to see if maybe she could let it out along the zipper but she didn't sound too optimistic. the phone marathon continued.

the major problem lies in the fact that this saturday is exactly five weeks before the wedding. i can't go back and pick up my dress and see if it fits until next friday. exactly 4 weeks and 1 day before the wedding. making it very bad timing if i need to find a replacement dress.

HOWEVER...

i went back to david's after work today. i told the consultant what happened and that i wanted to try on some dresses, just in case. i found two that i like ALOT. quite different from my original dress, but still with a similar 'vintage' feel. (one of which i would probably have picked over mine, had they been around at the same time) the consultant assured me that since they are new styles and i am a fairly common size, they would definitely have them in stock next weekend. and she said there would still be enough time to have a bustle done before the wedding too, IF i needed to get a second dress. but, i was also able to talk to the seamstress again as well, and she said now that she's had a chance to look at it, she thinks it should be possible to alter it so that it actually fits me. so everyone keeps your fingers crossed for me.

maybe this won't be a total disaster after all. though i really did like those two dresses...